dazai!

It's a horrible party. That is, Dazai thinks all parties are horrible until he is very, very drunk, and even then, he'll complain about it in the morning. He's simply not a social person, as outgoing and obnoxious as his personality seems to be. And yet, here he is. Why?

Free alcohol, of course. He's not going to attend a dry party.

He seems to continuously end up running in the same circles as that Jouno fellow. Dazai hates him, too, but he's pretty, surprisingly good at making out when he's not trying to use his teeth, and it's sort of amusing to watch him get angry.

Which is what he's planning to do until he's drunk enough to enjoy himself. It's honestly pretty clear neither of them wants to be here, but Dazai is much better at faking it than Jouno is. Oh, he has no doubt the guy could fake it if he wanted to; it's that he simply doesn't, and that in itself is sort of impressive.

"What boldness you have, to look this out of sorts at someone else's party. Do you look like this at your own as well?" Dazai sips the red plastic cup of something he's nabbed, a very distinct alcohol aftertaste.

[Dazai loathes the idea of working with Chuuya. Hadn’t he already done his time? They’d spent years together, and he’d hated it just as much, so being told they’re partnered on a joint mission again is almost enough to make Dazai outright refuse. However, he also hates his plans going wrong, and for this one to work, he needs to be there. The one saving grace is that Dazai knows Chuuya is going to hate it just as much.

That hardly makes it easier, though.]

You step on my foot once, and I’m throwing you under the bus.

[They’re meant to be attending this gala together, and at least Chuuya more or less knows how to dress himself. Dazai had fussed and squirmed the entire time he’d been fitted for a suit, but he looks presentable, hair tucked behind his ear, no wrinkles to be found. He’s wearing some ridiculous cologne that he hates, and keeps wanting to tug his collar open.

He is not looking forward to the dancing portion of this party. It’s not that he doesn’t know how—he’s been thoroughly taught against his will, and still remembers. No, it’s the fact that Chuuya is expected to be his partner.

Disgusting.]

Dazai is, once again, disappointed. No matter how much he taunts Akutagawa, she's never any better at ignoring it. She always uses the same predictable attacks that won't land on Dazai, harnesses that same aggressive energy that is so utterly shameful. So, she deserves it when Dazai stands over her on the floor, looking down--cold and impassive, as usual--and makes a noise. A tsk of disappointment.

"You still haven't improved at all. I'm beginning to think you never will." No matter how much he taunts and the awful things he says, Akutagawa still follows him with that same unflinching devotion, and it's honestly sickening. "Is there anything I've said that has made it through that empty head of yours? Maybe the only thing you're good for is decorating the floor like this."

He crouches, wondering if she'll attack again. If so: boring. It's all so tiring.

Dazai doesn't really remember how this started. One minute, he and Jouno were going at each other, snide comments and passive aggression, and the next, they're meeting up at least once a week to either study, or to fuck. Would he call this a 'friends with benefits' situation? Not really. There are benefits, sure, but he'd hardly call Jouno a friend except where said 'friend' can overhear it, because Dazai knows it would annoy him. Thus, not friends.

But there certainly are benefits. Jouno's not a bad lay, and Dazai doesn't really have the sort of personality that permits him to find a steady date, not does he want one. Getting someone to go home with him, or take him home, requires effort, and there's a chance of it being terrible; at least with Jouno, he knows what he's getting, and it's fun. There are spoken and unspoken agreements, and someone to match Dazai's terrible personality.

They're having one of those weekly sessions now; Dazai lounges on his bed, scrolling his phone while he waits for the knock on the door. He's got work to do for classes, but it's really nothing he can't hastily complete the night before with a good amount of caffeine, so whatever. This is much more important.

As someone who used to be in the profession himself, Dazai has connections. He knows things, hears things, and he's heard plenty about Akutagawa. Most of them are not good things: unpredictable, prone to violence, unpleasant, blunt, terrible at faking. And Dazai has seen him--of course he has, it's not as though he'd take on a project without seeing what he'll be working with. He's not bad to look at, which is really his only saving grace, but a saving grace it is. Yes, it's something Dazai can use, and so he strikes up a deal with Akutagawa; Dazai will teach him, help him earn more in exchange for a cut of the pay. It's a good deal, and he knows it. Dazai is experienced, knows what people want, how to play the games they expect. Akutagawa needs help, and money. Beneficial for the both of them, but Dazai isn't the one who will have to put his body on the line this time.

But he is the one who will need to teach Akutagawa how to do it. From what he's heard, Akutagawa's performance ranges from passable to abysmal depending on the client, and that simply won't do. Dazai gives him an address--a hotel room, a nice one, and tells him the time. If Akutagawa isn't exactly punctual, Dazai will refuse him, rescind the offer. He has no time for someone who doesn't take this seriously, and who isn't entirely obedient to what he says.

This is probably nicer than any place Akutagawa has been, he thinks, waiting--with drinks! what a good host--for the knock at the door. They'll lay out the agreement, and Dazai will get to work. He's hoping that Akutagawa isn't as awful to work with as people say he is, but then, Dazai has dealt with some unpleasant people in the past, and his confidence has enough merit behind it that it carries weight. If not? Well, Akutagawa can see himself out, and pay Dazai for his time.

Besides, there's no deal just yet. Only if Akutagawa agrees to be taught, to allow Dazai control and liberty over how he decides to do it, will there be anything to speak of. Dazai glances at the clock-ten to five. The alcohol is tempting, but he won't have any of it until things have been discussed; he doesn't get drunk when conducting business.